letter to my younger self

A Letter To My Younger Self

July 23, 2019

Dear La-Tisha,

It’s you, at 40. So yes, you will live through the ups and downs of your adolescent years.

Here’s one of my favorite quotes to remember and live by: “Life is tough my darling, but SO ARE YOU.”

People will continue to pronounce your name wrong, just smile and correct them. Don’t respond to the wrong name. Eventually, you will just have them call you Tish to make it easy for them.

What happened to dad was not your fault. Ask mom to let you speak to a therapist to help you mourn in a positive way. 

Try to remember as much of him as possible so you’ll have those memories to hold on to, even when you want to push all of the memories out because they hurt. The pain will eventually ease. But once a memory is gone, it’s gone. 

You will start to take dance lessons as you’ve always wanted. When you first start dancing, don’t second guess yourself. Try your best and act more confident than you are. Continue to stay motivated even when others mock you and put you down because of your height. Just remember, they’re treating you that way because they see so much talent in you, it scares them. When you’re not dancing, ask to watch the other classes instead of staying in the dressing room. It will pay off when you finally become the dance teacher you’ve always known you would be. When the teacher corrects you, listen and try to apply the correction, even if you think you’re right. Smile and tell them, thank you, it will only make you the best dancer you can be. When it’s time for high school, go to the performance art school you got accepted to, even if the transportation seems confusing. Don’t let anyone talk you out of going.

When mom makes you take piano lessons instead of singing lessons, try to stick it out for at least a year. But also, keep asking her to put you into singing lessons, it will only cause you to sing better and possibly become a triple threat.

When your family members and friends of the family harm or abuse you, it’s not your fault. It’s their fault and they have problems, not you. Speak up for yourself, no matter who it is, demand they stop, and tell someone you trust.  If you feel like there is no one you can go to about it, even a therapist, even mom, remember you will always have God by your side. He will give you the strength you need to survive and remove those people out of your life. 

You’re pretty good at making friends, not so much keeping them. A few of them will stab you in your back. But again, remember they are the ones with the problem. True friends would never stab a friend in the back to get ahead. Don’t let it cause you to not trust people. There are some great people in the world, even if they are only in your life for moments instead of years.  Try to keep in contact with those friends that had a positive impact on you. They are the ones worth holding on to, no matter how far you’ve moved away.

When it comes to boys, you may never understand why the ones you’re attracted to are just not into you. I’m still trying to figure it out. But most of the boys you like, grow up to be UGLY! I know that may not be the nice thing to say, but after the way they treat you, it’s okay. There will be a few who will love you like crazy, some may be shorter than you because you are tall. Just let them down easy. When you get to high school, don’t feel bad because the boys will see you as wife material, not girlfriend material. Even though it will make no sense to you then, it is such a compliment. Hold on to your virginity, because none of the boys in high school are worthy to take that from you. Don’t ever feel sad or depressed when you get dumped for being the good girl. The right boy will appreciate you and love the fact that you are saving yourself for marriage. Yes, you will eventually want to get married. You will decide that around your senior year of high school. 

Apply for all of the colleges you want to. Go to the college you want to go to, not the cheapest one. Don’t become roommates with any of your friends, it will save your relationships. Have fun and do your work, you need a healthy balance. Remember you are in school for an education, not a husband. You won’t meet him until years later anyway. If a guy doesn’t chase you, he’s not worth your time. The ones worth dating will put forth more of an effort to be with you than you will ever put forth. 

Do as many internships as you can, they will definitely pay off after graduation. You know, just in case you don’t open up that dance studio. Which you won’t, at least not before you’re 40. College years, though they may be depressing, are some of the best years of your life. So do your work, go to most of your classes, make smart decisions, join the organizations you want to join, and be positive about life.

Your life growing up may have been tough, but it made you become even tougher. You can do anything you put your mind to. Keep the confidence and fight for what you want!

xoxo Tish

P.S. Be the reason someone smiles today. – unknown

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